DWO: Driving While Octopus
Friday, August 28, 2015 at 12:00AM By Al Vinikour
There are certain things you should never do while driving. This is one of them.The other day I was passing a vehicle on the freeway and I happened to look at the driver as I went by. At first I thought I was looking at another poor soul who had been beaten severely with an ugly stick. This woman looked like a cross between the Sea Hag and Alice the Goon. But then I noticed she had a cell phone in her left hand… and a cigarette in her right. How she steered the car still puzzles me, but her vehicle seemed to be staying in its own lane. I got to thinking about people who can multi-task with two hands, like waiters and waitresses at a restaurant. You’ve seen them… they line up about 3-4 plates on their left arm and have one or two more in their right. I’ll bet if you asked one of them for a straw they could balance the plates and pull one out of their apron without disturbing a pea.